Secret Society of the Turd

Sat, Jan 31, 2015 - 5:44pm

First and foremost, I wanted to congratulate Turd (belatedly) on his birthday – here’s to 49 more. Is it JUST a coincidence, that this year also marks Superbowl XLIX? I think not.

Thanks, TF for all you do – working without rest, even when clearly sick, even on your birthday, through holidays and weekends, vacations and funerals. All of us on the site deeply appreciate your efforts, and all of us have become richer in many ways, even if not all of us in FRN terms.

My, what long, strange trip it’s been. Since first discovering the importance and unique position of precious metals in the global economy, to searching out and visiting my first LCS, buying my first ‘stack’ of a meager ~40 ounces of silver -- and the roller-coaster ride to where we are today.

The value of a community such as this one has always been enhanced, nay, half-defined by the contributions, personalities, humor, insights and perspectives of the participants -- you all, my fellow Turdites. While the site from its outset has fostered a free exchange of ideas, encouraged interaction through comments, posts, forum threads and live webinars, I have long toyed with the idea that it would be really cool to meet my fellow Turdites in person. I've certainly 'met' and 'spoke with' many here whom I would love to have a chance to meet, and a few whom I am proud to call friends despite never having had that chance.

Until the grand, global Turdville Summit can be organized, I figured it would perhaps be possible to take matters into our own hands. I would like to propose an inaugural meeting of the Secret Society of Turd (SST©), Pacific Northwest Chapter.

Proposed date: Sunday, February 8th, 4:00 PM

Proposed location: to be released individually, to confirmed participants, southwest Seattle, WA, where we can appropriately lament our individual and collective boating accidents. In the unforeseen event there is overwhelming interest/response, I can also look into a larger venue or event hall, but for now it’s just a bar. Sorry, only those with membership as of this post need apply. If this encourages you to sign up for an account, you will be very welcome at the (hopefully eventual) next meeting.

Forum link:

Contact: john dot yossarian896 @t hushmail period com

This is meant to be a completely informal gathering for any and all interested Turdites, local or visiting town that weekend. I have heard many arguments over the years AGAINST face-to-face meetings, about the risks and dangers. I say the risk/benefit ratio is in my favor in this particular case. Come on public transport/foot/taxi from a nearby but not proximal parking spot (many will be available nearby). Weave a surreptitious route. Do a bunch of rapid U-turns on the way. Wear a mask or Seahawks face-paint. Never reveal your real name, if you so choose. Leave your cellphone at home. Photography will be strictly controlled to ensure consensuality.

Perhaps even a few lurkers who rarely if ever post, or are uncomfortable with leaving an electronic trail online might be coaxed out of 'hiding' for some realtime interaction.

But I am increasingly convinced of the importance of personal, ‘REAL’ contacts, an actual network for ALL aspects of life – and the significance of this is, in my view, only going to increase in the days, months and years to come. Whether to swap stories, drown nosediving mining share tickers in beer, network professionally, share tips on gardening and (negative or positive) experiences in educating friends and family, I think this could be a fun occasion. Worst-case scenario – we sample the tap’s many local brews, and part company, never to meet again. Who knows, y’all might be such miserable, blightly buggers that I’ll flee with the first pint unfinished…

OR perhaps this could be the beginning of a regular bi-monthly/monthly get-together. If only 1 pair of people click and become friends, it will have been worth it. And perhaps (lofty and egotistical aspiration as this may be) we can inspire others around the country and the world to have more similar gatherings, and raise their glasses to Turd and all the denizens of Turdvillle.

If there ARE others out there who are interested in organizing/hosting get-together(s) for the same date and time, I am happy to bring along a webcam, and create a video link so that we may make this a trans-American (or perhaps even trans-continental) event. If many individuals join, there might be a bit of a cacophony -- but ideas on how this could perhaps be possible are also welcome.

Curious to hear thoughts on the matter, pro or con. Please use the forum thread above (or the comments section below) to indicate intent to participate, or email me directly. If you do, please take the time to set up a non-personally identifiable email account – a prudent step in any case, and DO tell me your TFMR handle. Either email me from the account associated with your TFMR login, or indicate what that is. I would like to take every precaution to ensure that this is an invitation-only event, if it happens.

PS: I suppose, in re-reading the post above, I did not make this sufficiently clear. I am (obviously) in the Seattle area, and thus can offer to host a small get-together for other Turdites here. But the larger point is that ANYONE can do the same -- in their metropolitan area, just as easily. Just as we have already seen Pining, California Laywer and BBB meet in the greater LA area, and have borne witness to a gathering of eminent Turdites (incl. Ned Naylor-Leyland, if I am not mistaken) in London -- this can be done ANYTIME by ANY Turdville citizen.

By the way, dear fellow Turdite participants of these shindigs, please re-post the pics if you would - I can't find them right now.

Just post the date and time and (surreptitious or open) directions for the pub, gathering hall or other public place here, or in the forums -- let's get more of these going, if anyone is of like mind. If you WANT to reach out and form your own chapter of SST -- the power is in your hands. There is no need for Tyler Durden himself to travel from city to city, from bar to bar to set up a local chapter of Fight Club -- the participants are ALREADY aware, are already subscribed.

If you own a bar or run a restaurant -- put out the call. If you know someone who does -- talk to them, and THEN do the same. If you are neither of those -- well, reserving a few tables at your favorite watering hole a few weeks out should not be too much of a challenge.

Go forth and multiply these local gatherings. I challenge the community to come up with at least 3 more gatherings for next weekend. There are, at a minimum, a few THOUSAND readers of the site out there -- reach out and touch someone today. Either post a response in THIS posts's comments -- or in the Forum link above. Or start a new Forum topic of your own. Either way, the power to make it happen is in YOUR hands.

About the Author


Jan 31, 2015 - 6:37pm

An idea whose time has

An idea whose time has come! Except, are we being secret to protect one another, or to maintain our stellar reputations in the community? We could get t-shirts that say I am Turd!

YOu know, the idea is growing on me. I do have a couple of old friends near Seattle. Gas is cheap. And the world is still in one piece, but may not be for long. Perhaps it is now or never.

Jan 31, 2015 - 6:40pm

Off Topic but a good place to rant!

This has been an interesting week in the construction business. We are building six townhouses in the city and the subcontractors are an interesting bunch. Most of the crews over the last few years are from south of the Rio Grande. Lots of those crews around today. I was encouraged to view my framing crew. Four men from north of the Rio and one was colored (few black framers these days). I do not like the term "African American" just Americans. People do not call me Polish American.

Boy what a mess that has invaded the lives of all these men. Foul mouthed, chain smokers, drugs, tobacco chewers, booze drinkers, rap hearers, divorced, and probably living at home with mom and dad or with their girlfriends. A BIG MESS.

I remember when the Hippies were into "California Dreaming" and my classmates painted their VW vans , threw away their bras, dressed in sack dresses and headed for the good life. Lots of weed! I thought "how will this end"? That was just the beginning and the counter- culture has spread its wings into everything:

Top Definition


any group of people whose beliefs, values, styles, and attitudes differ from that of the prevailing culture. Counter-culture began with the hippie movement back in the late 60's and 70's. In today's society, counter-culture is most often seen in the alternative subcultures.

The gothic, punk, emo, skater, raver subcultures are all examples of present-day counter-cultures.


Do we really believe that these movements do not affect the direction of a nation and what we export to a needy world? Do we think that the many comedians from Hollywood, late night T.V. trash, and even the casino entertainment, has no effect on the culture? I have watched this degeneration of morals and values over the last fifty years and now our nation is left to us in a desolate condition. The youth have been robbed of moral fiber, the young adults have lost their direction in life and grandma is trying to find employment.

Oh yes, I am in the small minority within this view. I have seen the destruction of the family unit as the parents align with the counter culture. This will not end well for the huge majority. It will take Big Medicine to heal this nation, however, the plague is still roaming the streets of America. jmo Jim

Jan 31, 2015 - 7:13pm

Is it just me

or is the NFL flipping us off?

Jan 31, 2015 - 7:35pm

Turd @ 49

Seven sevens, seven Shemitahs. I'm getting a little freaked out.

Paging Rabbi Cohan.

Jan 31, 2015 - 7:39pm

Kinda looks like a penis with a big knob to me

I want to ask my wife to polish it.

Jan 31, 2015 - 7:41pm

Thought I was gonna get lucky

But when I showed my wife that post she came at me with Tarn-X and a chore boy. Oh well, can't have everything - where would you put it?

Jan 31, 2015 - 7:43pm

@ JY896 Logo?

Let me know if you need a Logo for SST. My son is studying graphic design in college and he is good at Logos.

Ned Bradenvalvend
Jan 31, 2015 - 8:32pm

Lets have Pining

Make the logo....

Yale Skull and Bones motif, two RCM 100 oz silver bars; crossed. (Or two kilo AU bars)

Big yellow Hat in place of Skull


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Mr. Fix
Jan 31, 2015 - 10:00pm

Secret Society of the Turd?

That sounds only moderately dangerous, but I agree that ultimately there is a need for real-life human beings to network. Count me in. I would be quite interested in forming a Northeast chapter, however my community organizing skills are somewhat lacking. I know that there are plenty of us here in the New York metropolitan area, I'll check back later, to see what kind of interest is expressed.

Jan 31, 2015 - 11:44pm

What is the population of Turdville?

Any chance of putting a population counter somewhere on the homepage which would indicate Turdville's population, O Mighty Turd? It would be neat to see how many of us there are in this virtual village. Or maybe some kind of revolver map which shows the location of someone visiting the site? That's neat also.

As for a congress of turdites, JY896, that sounds okay, but a warmer locale (like Florida or Vegas) would be okayer. Still, it's a good idea.

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